How I Learned the Particulars of the Many Styles of Lawn Mower Blades

Lawn Mower BladesYou’d think that your weekly chore of mowing the lawn would be easy, until you see strips of long grass going uncut

For years I used a yard service to cut my grass. I was always working and when I got home on the weekends, all I wanted to do was lie around and relax. I’m no bum, but after a week of working my butt off, I just want some time off. My yard service was great. They came every Thursday and cut, edged and even used the weed whacker. I would get home on Thursday nights and see a beautifully manicured lawn. I was the best thing ever until the guy that did it went back to college.

He was a great guy, but I understood wanting to get out of a back breaking job and trying to better himself. However, this did leave me with a conundrum. Who was going to cut my grass? My wife had the answer. Me. It wasn’t the answer I was hoping to hear, but in the long run, it was probably for the best. How hard could it be? Just pull a string and walk around the yard. I only have half an acre, so it isn’t like some football field of work. I knew I was up for the job and I guess my beer belly could stand the workout too.

That Saturday I went out to the garage to get to work. I had talked my lawn guy into selling me his push mower before he headed off on his quest for knowledge. He warned me that it might need a little work, but should do the trick. He had taken really good care of it and the oil and gas were fresh. He just put a new air filter in it, so I figured it would give me at least one full season of cutting without incident. I had my sneakers, blue jeans, old t-shirt and baseball cap on. My wife brought me out a tall glass of ice water and set it on the table out on the porch. I was all set. I pulled the string and it roared to life.

I had only mown two passes before realizing I had a problem. I saw these long strips of tall grass where I had just mowed. What in the world was the problem? I turned off the mower and lifted it up to see the underside. There it was, plain as day, a pair of rusted out lawn mower blades with huge chunks missing. How in the world did that happen? Oh well, time to head off to the hardware store and get some new ones. How hard could it be?

I hopped in my truck and off I went. I got to the big box store and sauntered in. I saw the groups of he-men walking in and out of the store carrying wood, power tools and other assorted manly items. I pulled my shoulders back a bit and realized that I was just like them. I am a manly man going to the big box store to by manly items. It made me think of Tim Taylor and his grunting from the old Tool Time show. I walked in the store and looked for the aisle marked for lawn mower blades.

I found my way down row after row of tools, lighting, and barbecue grills to the area I was looking for. To my chagrin, I saw a very long aisle with a million choices. I walked up and down looking at all the different shapes and sizes of lawn mower blades. I didn’t think I’d ever find what I needed. The guy that worked in that department saw me walking around and must have immediately realized I needed help. He asked me what kind of lawn mower I had. I told him a red one. After he composed himself and wiped away his tears of laughter, he asked me the brand. I didn’t have a clue.

He took me over to where their lawn mower selection is and luckily I saw the one I had. Thank goodness my lawn guy used to shop here. The salesman took me back over to the dreadful aisle we were just on and started to walk. I followed him for what seemed like half a mile before we got to a wall filled with hanging lawn mower blades. He picked out the right ones and explained how to change them.

I purchased them and started home. Once I got there, I went to work changing out the rusty old ones and put on the shiny new ones. I was proud of my handiwork. My wife stood there with her hands on her hips. She knew what my next words would be. She always knows what I think. I smiled at her and said, “Now that I put on the new lawn mower blades, I’m ready for a nap.” She laughed and told me that the sofa was ready and had even put the game on for me to watch.

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